I’ve been a member of the Roman Catholic Church for a hot min, legit since birth. I was baptized, made my first communion and even made my confirmation, barely! I’ve always had drama at church because its literally a get together of the communities most judgmental people. Well it looks like I should of been the one judging them! After years of being so called “rumors and hearsay”, a Pennsylvania Grand Jury was formed to investigate if the Church was systematically covering up the sexual abuse and rape of YOUNG CHILDREN. Spoiler alert, THEY WERE.
This report was finally released a couple days ago and what was discovered will make you gag. Since 1947, over 300 Pedo Priests have sexually abused more than 1,000 children. That alone will make you sick but whats even worse is, when someone would report what happened to them, the church wouldn’t call the cops. Instead they just transferred that priest to another church, so he can have his pick of the litter there. HOW CAN THEY SLEEP? Ain’t no sleeping med gonna help them escape their haunting nightmares. No wonder the Catholic church is dying, everyone’s even been touched or afraid of being touched.
The stories in this report will deadass make you question your faith, if you already haven’t. One priest admitted he was sick in the head and begged for help, the church did nothing. Another priest was discovered to be HIV positive and was doing shit with children for years till he finally was turned into the police. Another priest abused several boys and instead of having his dick chopped of he was giving a job recommendation to work at Disney World, aka heaven for pedos.
To me it sounds like the catholic church is the perfect place for pedos. No one will question why you aren’t married, because you can’t be. No one will question why are you alone with children, you’ll just say “they’re just asking me to forgive their sins”. For DECADES the catholic church has gotten away with this shit because people were afraid of them, well not daddy! What are they gonna do, ban me from heaven? Girl please God and I are hella close. When they die, God, Whitney Houston and I will all be at the gate to greet them and kick their asses to hell.
My first drama with the church started when I was in the children’s choir. Everyone’s voice sucked ass but mine, so naturally I turned almost every song into solos starring me, and allowed the rest to be background vocals. Everyone loved it! My favorite jam was “Have you heard story about Christ? He’s finally here! Cha cha cha chahh”. Such a lit jam!
Finally this bitch Nancy complained, “she doesn’t come all the way to church just to see her daughter hum in the background”. SO RUDE! You go to church to pray, say sorry for cheating on your mans and listen to me. Fuck your snot nose daughter, can she hit these high notes? I think NOT! In the end, the choir leader said I had to go. Like sorry I’m the Beyoncé of the choir and everyone else is Michelle’s. I’m not gonna say I had anything to do with it, but attendance did drop after I was “forced to retire”.
Another fun church memory is when we were making sandwiches for the homeless, so sweet of us! My friends and I thought it would be fun to throw baloney on the ceiling. When our youth group leader, this old creep, came in to check on us and it fell down, he threw a bigger bitch fit than me. Grow up and put that energy towards praying.
Later that week, we were “teaching” inner city kids for the day. They were bad as fuck so entertaining then was hard. I thought it would be lit to play with the helium tank, well it was till it wouldn’t shut off and a balloon pop and legit people thought it was a guns shot. Mad people hit the deck. Creep church leader went nuts, called my mom like the snitch ass bitch he was. They always told my mom this is his last warning, girl please what you gonna do kick me out? My donations pay to keep these lights on, I will STOP giving my dollar each week.
The last straw was when I had to fill out my confirmation name information and put my name down as Matthew Patrick Judas O’Leary. They didn’t realize it till halfway thru printing out the programs. Sorry your secretary is blind as a bat! Learn to read girl! They told me I either had to write a letter to “Father” basically begging to not be kicked out, or my ass was gonna be kicked out quicker than the homeless after last call at the soup kitchen. I go okay peace bitches, but my mum grabbed me by my ear and made me write it. So extra! My church group was such bad little shits we were the only ones NOT allowed to go on the over night stay at some Jesus Camp. At the time we were pissed cause obvs we were gonna get lit there. But now I’m hella happy, because most likely I would of been raped in the middle of the night.
Xoxo one BJ to resolve all your sins? I would rather go to hell Father John!
Sir Dutches 
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