Okay when I first heard about the new TV show Heathers based on the 80’s classic I was annoyed. Heathers is legit in my top 5 favorite movies. It’s so dark but so hilarious, so how can they top that! I love anything with Wynona Ryder, I was a fan even when she got caught stealing. We all have those days where we seek attention.
This new show is a remake of the movie but with a heavy set girl, a genderqueer kid and a mix girl instead of 3 hot babes as the Heathers. I rolled my eyes at the casting. I ASSUMED they were just trying to corner the SJW crowd make it into something corny. BOY WAS MY ASS WRONG.
This show is so witty, the one liners alone kill me. “You smell like cigarettes and beef jerky, stop sleeping with my step mom”. A quick summary of this show, there are the 3 Heathers who run the school. You have the main Heather who’s heavy set but is legit the definition of a bitch. She will cut you down with insults so deep most won’t understand them. Then you have her gay bestie who’s genderqueer meaning one day he’s preppy the next day he’s dressed like Nancy Reagan. He’s my favorite, I die at everything he says.
The last of the crew is the mix lesbian Heather who’s not really a lesbian but has to say she is because in today’s age being black isn’t enough so she made it up. Yeah this show is that crazy lol. She’s the dumb one of the group, episode 2 with her is by far the craziest scene I’ve ever seen on TV. Who knew a roller skating party could be so bloody? The last of the group is Veronica. The outcast one of the group because she’s normal. So naturally she falls for the new mysterious psychopath. They kill someone by mistake but make it look like a suicide. And that’s the core of the show, how the suicide effects people and mad other crazy shit happen. & there’s a plot twist ugh I loved it!!!!
This show isn’t like Pretty Little Lairs, instead it’s a dark satire comedy on how fucked up out world is. We have people who use deaths of others for attention. We have parents who do everything to help their kid but listen. We have a need to be freaks and outcasts because being normal isn’t cool anymore. It’s like my time working for Hillary because I was just a normal gay kid, I was the outcast. I had to be non binary or transgender to fit in. Well I am NOT waiting to go to the bath room. This show attacks how legit coo coo bananas everyone is.
The first episode the main Heather attacks a dude for wearing a shirt with a Native American on it because “chad is 1/16th Native”. I couldn’t stop laughing because that’s legit how society is these days. People who should be offended aren’t getting offended, it’s the SJW crackers that are causing scenes. It’s like can people chill? Anything for attention!
So this show sounds beyond lit right? SO WHY DID PARAMOUNT CANCEL IT BEFORE IT AIRED? Oh because people are too sensitive these days. This show is offensive but it’s not like South Park for no reasons, it’s to make a point. A girl gets attacked by a male student and somehow she gets blamed for it because she was “out late at night”. This is how people really are thou! Episode 4 is called “Date rape and AIDS jokes”, so if you get offended easily, I don’t recommend you watch it. Yes there is violence and yes it deals with suicide but that’s because it’s teaching us that everyone is hypocrites. No one cares till it too late. Everyone is too self obsessed to see that the person in front of them is the one in pain.
This show was set to air last March and be the first show on the new Paramount Network which was formally Spike TV. I was excited to check it out, but then the Parkland shooting happened and because it involves suicide, school shootings and offensive jokes they decided to cancel it. Even thou they filmed it all, promoted it all over and paid the cast. They decided to not air it at all. I was LIVID. This could of made Paramount a household name from all the bitching over it. And then people would forget and move on. Why not ride the controversy and make your new channel famous??? This is the perfect show for people my age, Twitter would of eating this show up. It’s so offensive it’s funny. But instead they rather show 50 episodes of Lip Sync Battle, so annoying.
Paramount just announced yesterday that they are airing them all the week of Halloween but edited them to cut all the offensive jokes and the last episode so now it’s 9 instead of 10. Okay no that’s stupid. Air them all unedited! Stop censoring shit. The last one was supposed to be the worst one but I liked it….. look at how much attention 13 Reasons Why got from all the controversy. Controversy creates cash!!!They sold it to a network over seas unedited so that’s how I watched it. Honestly I binged them all in a day I was that hooked.
The best episode is episode 5, it’s filmed in first person point of view so it’s like trippy. Ugh can everyone watch this but not the edited bullshit one??? You will laugh, feel fucked up for laughing, then be hooked. I got them all so hit me up I’ll drop the link. If not we can have a night and watch them all plus the original movie!!!
Xoxo clap your ass elsewhere, I feel like I’m in Daytona
Sir Dutches 