For once everyone else made a fool of themselves Downtown but me!

For once in my life I wasn’t the ass of Downtown Syracuse and it felt AMAZING! Who knew adding a water in-between every drink could be such a life changer. My girlie and I were going to pick up our princess from her Christmas party. Last year this happened home girl was a little too turnt to go out but this year it was like God wanted us to have a fun, throw up free night. We picked her up and went to corner bar, we weren’t impressed with the crowd, so we bounced and went to York. The York is my fav bar next to Benjamin’s. Mostly because there is no cover, but also because I love the vibes, I feel like a Real Housewife! It’s so classy and upscale, unlike other downtown bars that are cesspools.

I was dancing my life away making so many new girlies when sadly 2am hit so we had to leave. As we go outside, right away it was like fight club. Punches thrown left and right, most likely over a thot. I made a instagram video of that fight but sadly it was deleted because the caption was “Can these crackers go home” oh thats not fine but all the porn on insta is OKAY! I tired to get the lowdown but then another fight broke out. We walked over to see what’s good while I’m chanting “Stop fighting over me”m that’s when I realize it was a dude and a chick. I didn’t know if I should break it up or call Vera House.

I helped the girl up like a skinny superhero, then these two other girls started to go at it. Like Damn I just wanted to go to my home girls house and order pizza, not break up a potentially incriminating fight. Luckily the 12 came and broke it up and that’s when the funniest thing 2018 happened. I looked down and one of the girls weave was balled up like a rat. I picked it up and walked over to her and said “baby girl your hair”, she rips it from me and threw it to the ground and shouted ” I don’t want that shit”, I died laughing and I know God did too.

As we are waiting to leave before another fight broke out, a dude walked up to my girlie. They hit it off like some Nicholas Sparks novel but then my girlie felt weird and was like let me see your ID. Homeboy was mad young, was he trying to have my baby girl catch a charge? The nerve of these young boys is unreal isn’t there a Disney Channel Original Movie on tonight. Always check ID’s unless you wanna end up on the sex offender registry. So in the end, everyone else was mad sloppy acting like they’re on WWE. When I’m trashed I yell inappropriate things and drool, when everyone else is I guess they fight? Just another reason why I always carry around my tazer, Zap Zap bitch.

Xoxo BABY GIRL YOUR WEAVE

P.S. if you want a insta video of mine deleted because it makes YOU look bad, don’t come at ME being rude, that’s not how it works BUDDY