This last weekend I was at the Cardi B concert at the Lakeview Amphitheater. It was an AMAZING time of twerking, drinking and making my father ashamed of me once again. I expected to make memories, maybe even blackout, but NEVER in my wildest dreams did I imagine I would be offered an amazing opportunity... Continue Reading →
Like can my desperate friend and I ever catch a break? One day its a hep C scare that was actually eczema the next its an alert her ex was released from prison. Like does God want her dead? Let me backtrack, before the parole hearing. My girlie met this deadbeat at the gas station,... Continue Reading →
I think someone I know has a two dads fetish. Her dad is 100% straight and with a top notch wifey. But for some bizarre reason his daughter dates potential cold case murders. I'm convinced we will find out he killed Heidi Allen before we find out he really loves her. She can't be with... Continue Reading →
Can I just worship Jesus Christ, my Lord and sassy savor in peace? No, because my girlies have to blow my phone up begging me to pick them up from the Super 8 motel. I like to wake up, immediately throw up to cleanse myself from the night before then hit up my local church... Continue Reading →
My skinny minnie co-worker wrongly thought this years Valentines Day will consist of her eating Ice Cream while crying herself to sleep again. BOY WAS SHE WRONG. Her new bumble mystery mans surprised her at work with a Valentines Day miracle. She STILL waiting on gifts her past boyfriends promised her but "lost". Show me... Continue Reading →
I always get random calls. May it be from one of my girlies asking me if its cool their new mans live with their baby mama(its not). Or one of my baby girls with a tax question that turns into me having to tell them their fiancé is an illegal immigrant and that's why he... Continue Reading →
I've been best friends with my baby girl since middle school. From the first time she tried to beat my ass because I became friends with her mortal enemy, the so called "school slut". To a month later when I passed her lunch table and she said "Yoo you matt? I heard you mad funny.... Continue Reading →
I truly feel bad for my baby girl. First it was someone keying her car saying "cum dumpster", which she can't fix till the insurance check comes in. So yeah she's driving around looking like a dumb ass. Then it was the anonymous emails of her nudes. Now it's her being fired because her mans secret... Continue Reading →
It always amuses me to see how people handle being cheated on. Do they dump the deadbeat and pull a How Stella Got Her Groove Back. Or do they look dumb as fuck by getting back with the dude and forever getting hostile when you see the side hoe. You look dumb BITCH! Doing his... Continue Reading →
Now that Mama Dutches is Skinny Minnie, EVERY BROTHER & their daddies be hitting her up. It's like oh, now you wanna tap that? Where were you when she was going thru her Old Country Buffet stage? Now she on that Salad & meal prep life you think you can slide thru? BOY BYE! My... Continue Reading →
Sir Dutches 