Saturdays are for the Jealous

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I looked AMAZING……she didn’t

On Saturday, I witnessed a few of daddy’s girls TRUE colors. The amount of jealously I was subjected to was honestly disgusting. I didn’t take two hours to get ready to be disrespected. I am just so over people NOT being supporting with their words. But instead having the energy to show jealously with their eyes. You think I can’t see those side eyes? Girl bye, I perfected the side eye.  Don’t EVER try to be cute in a public setting and make sly petty comments about me, cause girl I will serve them 100% ruder. I have no heart, so my comments will reflect that. The amount of shade I will throw at you will be deadly. My low ball comments are so low, they’ll turn you transgender. Don’t get into the ring with daddy if you can’t handle it. And if you think your tears will move me,  they will not. Emotions are for the weak. Tears make me stronger. So please next time you want to get into a game of shade with daddy, you best have Obamacare, cause my words are deadly.

Saturday night, the jealous one and I got into an argument using one liners and shade. It was all fun and games until she took it to a whole other level. The comment I will not lie, was so low, so distasteful, it honestly threw me off. Even while writing this I am getting all boiled up. The statement she made was so spiteful, I just couldn’t believe my ears. This girl had the nerve to say, are you ready for this, she said with ZERO remorse, “this is why you WEREN‘T invited to our Christmas Party”. I was honestly so taken a back, I legit felt the music come to a halt and YES, there were a few gasps. WHO SAYS THAT. I could NOT believe she took it to that level. But my cold heart does NOT allow for me to dwell on the rudeness. I immediately threw an even RUDIER comment back, daddy ALWAYS gets the last word. I can’t say the comment because it’s too real for sirdutches.com. But let’s just say it involves her hair extensions and her baby. Like it honestly felt like, I was the Real Housewives, when’s the reunion special to address the fight? The Christmas party is deff the elephant in a room full of jealously. Quick background story, basically one of my main girls has an annual Christmas party and I’m never invited. No big deal, your Christmas cookies are ass anyways. But basically I said something about it, because 2018 Matt is real AF.

 

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I’ll never drink a Four Loco freeze again, it looks like I deadass ate Cookie Monsters ass

 

What annoyed me the most is that everyone was immediately on her side! What about sweet skinny Matt! I was still shook from that comment! I HAD to whip out my phone and write this post. I had WAYY too many emotions bottled up, I HAD to get them out. I love how everyone was like omg girl are you okay? WHAT ABOUT ME? Everything turns into omg Matt’s so mean, mean sassy Matt. Cry me a river sista. What makes me blush, is the fact that this girlie and I are honestly family. We obvs made up later that night and danced the night away. It was honestly sooo romantic. See thats how you know someones a real best friend, because you make up after a fight of jealously. I vget it! With natural Native American cheek bones like mine, who wouldn’t be jealous!

To another rude “stranger”, don’t think I didn’t notice you NOT playing my song selections, because I do. I even texted you basically begging like a homeless person, for you to play just ONE song, and you ignored it, so selfish. Your pre-game songs are beyond horrible and no one was moving or grooving. STOP TRYING TO MAKE JUSTIN TIMBERLAKE A THING. His new album sucks my God, how many times are you going to sneak in one of his new songs and attempt to make us like it…. BECAUSE ITS NOT WORKING. Our IQ’s are WAYY too high to fall for that. I am convinced she made this playlist and every 4 songs added one of his shit new ones. Also when you said you had no liquor and then later pulled out a bottles of Tito’s out of your purse I almost dropped my glass of wine. I was so tempted to smash your Tito’s girl. Who lies about Tito’s? Someone sick, that’s who.  Ur un-invited to my funeral, make new plans u bimbo Judas.

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Spoiler alert…..the song WASN’T played

Lastly, why does the bartender at Suds hate me? Are you seriously that fucking jealous of me, you refuse to serve me a drink? Like quit with the jealously and do your job! Every time I go to Suds, I seriously sit there and the main bartender NEVER serves me. All I want is my rum & coke, why you gotta play games? I am beyond done with it! What did I EVER do to you! I always bless with my tips and I kill with my kindness. I haven’t stepped foot in Suds in months and on Saturday, my girlies and I finally graced them with our presence. Multiple people complimented me on my website, I was looking AMAZING in my cardigan, I was deff feelin myself, so I go up to get a drink and after 10 mins of being ignored I bounced. Like why you gotta treat me like your stalker ex boyfriend? I can OBVS see you’re childish, so my girlies and I are DONE entertaining your establishment. Enjoy being a single bitter bitch your whole life.

Xoxo the jealously MUST end

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